When my son was first born the idea of going back to work was laughable. There was no way I’d ever leave my little new born, are you crazy? He needed me!
But as the weeks and months rolled on, I started to learn more about my little baby Oliver and I learned even more about myself. We would go to playgroups and he enjoyed being with the other kids. He would crawl away from me and be as happy as a clam. He didn’t freak out when I’d leave his side. He would stop, look at me and smile and wave and that told me, “I got this mom, I’m good!”.
I also learned that as much as I don’t want to miss a thing that happens in my sons little world, I also need my own world away from the home and my beautiful family. And you know what? I’m not sorry about that and I don’t feel selfish. For so long I felt so ashamed that I was choosing to go back to work and have my son go to daycare. Because that’s the thing…it was a choice. I was lucky enough to have the option to stay home and care for my family full-time. Instead I chose to go back to work.
When friends ask me how it’s going being back to work with a sympathetic look on their face, I don’t know what to tell them. I love what I do and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I’m able to provide Oliver with a really amazing care provider who feeds hims amazing foods, teaches him about his feelings and caring for others. I’m also able to provide my family with some extra financial stability which feels amazing, especially after a year of maternity leave. As well, I get to be apart of a wonderful organization doing meaningful work that I am really proud of and to top it all off work toward a fulfilling career that will last well beyond my children’s infancy.
I’m really proud of my decision and how well me working outside the home is working for our family. If Oliver wasn’t thriving at daycare or didn’t enjoy where he was it would be a completely different story, but right now this works for us.
My advice for any moms who have a decision to make is to think about every aspect. Think about the here and now but also think about the future. Figure out what you want your life to look like in a month, in a year and several years down the road and even into retirement years! And most importantly use your heart. What does your heart tell you?
If you have any questions or fears about heading back to work or just want to chat please reach out to me and we can chat.